Behind the Pen

I haven't published anything - yet. But even before I started to write the novel I've got ready for publication, I knew that I wanted to keep my real name out of the picture. Alison J. Summers is just a pen name. Alison comes from the fact that my last name is 'Ali'. Summers come from my first name and also because I was born in the summer. The J initial has no connection to my name. I just thought it had a better sound to it when there was an initial. When I first started writing at the age of 12, I didn't think people could hide their names when they wrote something. And when I found out about pen names, I knew right at that moment that I wanted one. 

Something attracted me to writing under a pen name early on. It's not like I'm a private person or that I'd much rather not have people see who I am. That's not the case. Later on in my career, I'd love to do book signings or talk in front of people - I have no issue with public speaking; I used to do Speech and Debate, so that's not a problem. There's just something mysterious - super hero-like - when it came to writing under a pen name, like I had a double life or something. 

 (I freakin' love Jem. You couldn't pay me to watch the movie that came out last year.)

The reason to why I'm bringing this up now is because of this artist I tweeted about just yesterday. His name is Who is Fancy. His debut song (Goodbye) has three different music videos. But out of all three of them, none of them have the actual artist singing for the song playing. Weird, huh? I thought it was amazing and original, thus leading me to talking about it now.

This also made me think about Sia and how she doesn't like showing her face anymore. I started to listen to Sia back in 2010 when her song "I'm in here" was on VH1 for Top 20 Countdown. And after that, I've loved her music ever since. When she started doing the "I'm not showing my face in interviews or at performances" thing, I was a little confused because she had started her career with people seeing her face...and then all of a sudden...you stop showing your face? I found it strange, but then I found out why she did it and I complete respect that. She has her reasons and they're valid reasons. If you don't know, I advise you to watch her talk about it in this interview: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P4DMk9BJyY4

(Weird segue) Don't get too excited though. Sometimes, hiding your identity might backfire. Here's a fun fact: Stephen King wrote under a pen name for a few titles under the name Richard Bachman. He was already an established author at this point, but still published it under a completely different name. And you know what happened? It didn't sell well. After that, he got it republished, but with his name on the cover. Instantly, it sold more copies. I can see why he probably wanted to write under a pen name, J.K. Rowling did the same thing for an Adult Mystery novel that came out not to long ago. I think if you're an established writer and you write a book under a pen name, you're probably doing it because you want to get a few reviews from people who typically aren't your fans, so you might not have that much pressure (I'm only guessing) and you can have people read your book without them knowing whose book they're reading. Or maybe not. Jennifer L. Armentrout writers under the pseudonym J. Lynn for whenever she writes Adult/New Adult books, and I think she does that to show her Young Adult readers that there's mature content in her books when she writes as J. Lynn. 

That's all I've got to say for this post. I hope you enjoyed reading it. 

Sincerely,

--Alison

Write, Write, Write

Just yesterday, I was asked why I write books. For a moment, I kind of just sat there without saying anything at all. After so many years of writing, I had collected multiple reasons to why I still write every day...but I couldn't recall what was the very first reason. So now, I'm going to tell you guys my life with writing.

 At first, I had started making stories because it entertained me for hours on end. Then, about a year or so into making stories, I found it almost therapeutic. Whenever there was something going on in my life and I couldn't find any other way to express myself, I found a voice that could help me through it while making fictional characters come to life.

Originally, writing novels didn't start that way though. Like it says in my bio, I started writing novels only because I used to make comic books. After finishing one of my comic books series, I thought it would be cool if I took Lizzy's crazy journey (my main character from the comics), and transform it into a novel. While writing this wacky, silly story, I discovered that it just wasn't much fun to write the same exact story. So, I decided to write a completely new story. Alas, The Start of the End was born. I'm not kidding you, that was really the name of my first story. People used to always tell me that the first time you do anything, you won't do a great job. But of course at the age of 13, (when I had created this craptastic story) I didn't think my story was bad. I thought it was golden. I even made my family read it...and they did! They even went as far as to say they "loved it" and that I should make more stories. 

In short, the story followed a new girl named Sammy who had just moved to New York from Idaho with her older brother and newly widowed mother. On the first day at her new high school, she falls for a boy named Jared. Seriously, he tries to kiss her like the very first day. What a horn-dog. Any who, she starts getting feelings for Jared, but then this other guy named Ron steps into the picture--still on the very first day may I remind you. Ron is the star athlete at Wilson High and he's got his eyes set on Sammy the second she enters their writing class. Ron instantly asks Sammy out and she says yes--of course she would, why wouldn't she? He's hawt -.- During their date to the mall, Jared shows up with his gang of friends and intervenes, asking Sammy how in the hell is she dating Ron. 

(Here's a little excerpt. Errors and all. Side note: Sammy had also gotten asked out by Jared but she lied and said she had to go and help her mom with something. When in actuality, she was going out with Ron. When Sammy and Jared see each other at the mall, Jared is both hurt and confused. Sammy is nervous. I don't show the readers that she is nervous, though, I tell them.) 

"Can I talk to you for a second," Jared asked.

"Sure," I answered with a small pause. He pulled my arm and then said.

"Do you like this Randel guy?" he asked.

"It's Ron," I said.

"Well do you?" he asked and I thought for a sec.

"Well not really. I don't know him that well to like like him," I answered.

"Good," he said.

"Good?" I asked.

"Well it's good for me," he said.

"Why?" I asked. He grabbed my hand. 

"Because I like you more then than a little," he answered.

"Really!" I said with a shocked voice.

"Yup, when I fist  first saw you," he answered.

"Aw that kind of you," I said with a smile.

"So you ready to go," he ased [A/N: I guess at this point I forgot how to spell ask] 

"No I have to leave with Ron. I think he likes me," I said

"Who? Ron Miller?" he asked.

"Yeah," I answered.

"He's gay." he said.

"What?" I said very shocked.

"Yeah he asked me out last week," he said.

"O.m.g," I said. I couldn't believe the guy I missed a movie with Jared--who likes me--for a guy who is gay. I left with Jared. He walked me home and we talked for somewhat of a long time. For 5 min. No cheezz. I got cold so he gave me his jacked [jacket] 

"So is this your house?" he asked.

"Yeah, It is," I answered. I was waiting for him to say something. And then I started walking up to the door. He grabbed my arm and kissed me for at least 3 mins. I went to the door and waved goodbye."

Wow. Just wow. You don't know how many times I cringed while reading and typing this piece of garbage onto this blog post. I added a tagline/tag at the end of ever piece of dialogue, spelled things wrong, and had the most boring interaction between characters in history! This was so so so so so so so bad. Sammy was so mean and Jared was unappealing in every way. If you're wondering, no Ron isn't gay. He has a twin brother named Randel who is gay and people mix the two of them up AAAAAALL THE TIME. 

I'd like to think that my writing has improved through out the years. That story was written eons ago and I've written a lot of stories since then. And as time has past, I've found more and more reasons to why I want to write. Not just to keep my mind at ease or because I'm bored. The reason to why I keep writing is deeper than that. In a way, I need to write. It's a part of my life as much as my family is a part of me. I would be nowhere without either of those things, and I'm more than positive I have become the person I am today because of them both. 

Another point I'd like to bring up is that you should never stop doing what you love. Just keep writing and writing. Even if writing isn't your passion, just do what you love until the end of time. Don't do something simply for the money, because that'll get old pretty fast. Don't do something you're only doing for other people around me. Do what you want to do because it makes you happy...because it makes you feel more and more alive. 

I'm getting cheesy. Or how 13 year old me would say: cheezz. On that note, I'll say goodbye before I turn into a Hallmark movie. 

Be safe,

Sincerely,

-Alison

Who Am I?

Recently, I realized that I never really had a "This is Me" post, or even a welcoming post. Odd, huh? I know I have a "About Me" section, but I don't think that's enough. One of the main reasons I never really went in great detail on who I am is because I'm just not very good at that stuff. Or at least not on paper. I'm great at ice-breakers. *not being sarcastic*

So, because of my lack of explanation on who I am and why I have this blog--if it's not evident enough--I'll tell you. 

First things first: I'm not cocky or trying to brag about myself, I'm simply stating things about me. 

So no need to say I'm full of myself for wanting to add more information on myself or say....

Then again, there really is no reason to say that since I've got nothing to brag about. Let's get started!

If it's not obvious, I love adding gifs and images to my posts. About two months ago, I didn't know how to add gifs into posts or book reviews on Goodreads, so I'm still kind of new to this. The reason to why I made this blog is so I can easily connect with possible readers/fans through out my writing career.

Here's some basic info:

1-I've been creating stories for the past seven years. It first started off as making these dreadful comic books (they were about three pages long, front and back). I made those for about two years. Somehow, that transitioned into writing novels. I wanted one of my comic book characters to have their own book to match...After that first day of writing, I was hooked into writing short stories. That progressively turned into writing novel length stories.

2-I live in California. I lived in Texas for most of my life.

3-English isn't my first language, but I speak it fluently. Most people can't tell English isn't' first language when they first meet me since I've an American accent.

4- I used to hate New Adult novels. Wait, hate is the wrong word. I used to really dislike the novels I came across in the New Adult genre. I dislike a lot of things within the books I found. Such as: the slut shaming, the need for every female heroine character being a virgin and the guy having to be a player, the lack of diversity, and many other things as well. Now that I write New Adult and have come across more novels in the past year, I have grown to love the genre a lot more than I initially did.

Because I'm completely lost on how to continue this post, I'm going to use some questions I got online to keep this blog rolling.

1. How old would you be...if you didn't know how old you are?

Hmm. Being older is nice and all because of freedom, but I miss the days when I didn't have to stress anything besides missing. Things were so much similar from ages 0-12, then when puberty hit like a freakin' freight train, things just went downhill from there.

But mentality wise, I think I'm a lot older than I actually am. I'm probably in my late 20s if you go based on how I act, talk ,carry myself.

2. What would you do differently if you knew nobody would judge you?

Well, that's simple to answer. I'd dance more; read a taboo book I probably should be reading in private, but read in public (such a rebel); tell my mother about all the things I've lied to her about throughout the years--even the shameful stuff; and lastly, show the world my sh*tty comic books that I wrote in middle school. I'd never do that now because I know they're truly awful. Just to show you how horrible they were, I'll tell you one of the titles. "The Adventures of Weirdo Boy and the Nerdy Villain"...I really wasn't leaving anything up for imagination or mystery; you can only guess what happened in the story and who the villain was.  

3. Who do you love? And what are you doing about?

See, this question is confusing. Do they mean in a romantic sense? Or your family? I don't know, so I'll answer for both. For my family, I think I should be a lot more nicer to them with all they've done for me. In general, I don't treat them with zero respect; I honestly love them all to death, it's just sometimes I think with stress and my odd moods, I might just shut people off and not speak to anyone for a long stretch of time. That's something I need to fix personally. 

And I think I could say the same thing with the person that I'm with. (I don't know if he'd be okay with me disclosing his name, so let's just call him by W.) With the book still being worked on, I wish I could just put more time aside. On top of that, I'm really bad with responding quickly for messages or being mentally present when I'm there for the past few weeks. And for that, I deeply apologize W for my inconsistency and flat-out unacceptable behavior. I'm so glad that he can understand what I do and deal with me when I go M.I.A. for a while, trapped in my mind for hours on end. 

4. Do you think crying is a sign of weakness or strength?

I KNOW it's a sign of strength. In the world we live in today, vulnerability is seen as a weak thing, which it definitely is not. We shouldn't be teach people that being tough and "intimating" means you're a strong person; it means you're a insecure person, if anything. American's like to believe they our country is strong with the amount of money we pour into the military, but to me, I see fear. Think about it. When you're vulnerable, you're open and show your true colors. But let's say someone is completely closed off and never open whatsoever, most likely, people will associate that person of having insecurity issues, that maybe people will judge them. I think I'm rambling now, but you get my point right? Don't be afraid to show your emotions. They're powerful. 

5. Would you break the law to save someone you loved?

Yes. Rules were made to be broken. 

6. If you could do it all over again...would you change anything?

I'd try to be more honest from the get-go. And though I love the fact that I'm outspoken, I wish I could've shut up sometimes. 

7. If you had a friend who spoke to you in the same way that you sometimes speak to yourself, how long would you allow that person be your friend?

Sometimes, my comments to myself can be nice, but most of the time, they're quite brutal. I think it's just a part of being human. You point at your flaws a little bit longer than the rest; you dwindle time away on your issues more than you should. I wouldn't want to be friends with me in the end though. Would you? Leave you comments down below. 

8. Are you aware that someone has it WORSE than you?

Everyday. I live in a big city, so I see lots of things that I wish I didn't. And I'm not saying that in a snooty way. Multiple times I've driven past Skid Row, (for those who don't know, Skid Row is in a area of downtown Los Angeles where a lot of the homeless reside) and it is honestly one of the most heart-breaking things. The last time I was there--two weekends ago--I saw an elderly man stick a needle into a woman's neck and then stick the same needle into his own flesh. The woman began bleeding from his puncture, and he tried to assist her, but she wasn't having any of it and wander off. 

Stuff like this makes me want to help. I'm sure many of you have felt the same way, but didn't know how. We're on the same boat. I want to hand them money when they ask, but I'm worried that I'm contributing into their addiction. Is that just me? 

One of these days, I'm going to see if I can volunteer. Every Saturday, as it seems, they hand out food to the homeless. I'm going to see what origination runs this and see if I can pitch in. 

9. What advice would you give yourself three years ago?

You're worth more than what you think. Don't aim so low and don't take anyone's bull if they think otherwise. Laugh more! Stop worrying about the little things and embrace the more important ones! DON'T YOU DARE START ACTING LIKE A HIPSTER! TAKE OFF THOSE UN-PRESCRIBED GLASSES! AND STOP LISTENING TO THAT STUFF! Loving an unknown band simply cause they're unknown isn't cool. 

And those loser guys who ruined your idea of love? Tell them to eat dirt and then run along into the fucking sunset, cause you're about to meet someone that'll make your current heartache irrelevant. 

Life isn't over, even if darkness seems to be the only thing you see. Just wait. The clearing will appear soon. 

And to end on a positive note!

10. What do you want to achieve in ten years from now? 

• A healthy and happy family.
• A *satisfying* stable job.
• A few books published. 
• A Masters/PhD
• Still writing, no matter how this goes. Even if I sell 100 books or zero, I want my words out there.

Alright, that's enough for now. Hopefully I've said enough so you're not asking: 

OK! I'll stop using all of the gifs. They are so fun; I get carried away sometimes...wait, I just noticed that's Ray Romano's in this gif. Bonus!